I definitely do not blame all men... in fact, the reason I started publishing here on Medium was to share what a loving relationship I now have with a wonderful man (and also with my growing and healing self).

I escaped a toxic marriage- yes, through divorce- and I know I contributed to the dysfunction. The ex is still with the young woman he charmed throughout our divorce, he's repeating the same pattern with her that was the courtship and entanglement that happened with me.

I chose to go another route. I chose to heal and grow so I didn't attract another person to me that was not healthy for me.

And right when I was clinging to a fierce independence, my guy came along and treats me like no one ever has- but he's not a unicorn!

Now, when I'm feeling like a smitten teenager at 44 because I'm finally being treated well, I recognize that my lack of emotional intelligence attracted the wrong people for so many years... and if I wanted things to be different, I had to keep focus on my own growth. And anyone that I would partner up with also needs to have that desire for themselves, as well. My ex is not that kind of person. Emotional growth is not his thing and that's fine by me.

So, while my work may not be humorous to read, I've published several pieces about life and love with an amazing man who showed me what it means to be in a healthy relationship. I've never felt more honored and valued in my life, and I want to share that with the world!

I have written about my toxic marriage, mostly in regards to how different it feels compared to this new life I lead. After reading this story and the comments, I will definitely pay closer attention to the sentiment of my words- I would like women and men alike to want to read my words and feel the joy I feel! Hopefully, sweeping generalizations about any 'group' will not creep into my pieces without me knowing it. (However, I have written and published a few pieces while pissed off, and I can see how an emotion can overrule my reason and logic- see 'Somewhere in Trumpland' if you want a good dose of confusion and nonsense. I totally generalize and it's probably not that productive of a story... but I gotta say, it was a nice vent and if nothing else, I'll take away the knowledge that some distance from my work before publishing might be a good idea always!